Check out MomCrusades!

My friend has started her own blog and I want to give it an enthusiastic endorsement. Check it out here!

http://www.momcrusades.blogspot.com/

I was a teenage bully-victim

I just read an interesting article in which the author argues that the books for teenage girls written in the late 1960s through the 1980s (books that were read by trailing edge Boomer girls and Gen X girls) are far superior to those being published today. And I couldn’t help but think about my own experience as a girl in the 1980s and the impact these books had on me.

Blogger JenX67 often talks about the ground-breaking book “Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret” – in fact she’s named her own blog after that title. I, of course, read that and many other Judy Blume titles. But it wasn’t just the “classics” that got me through my rough junior high years.

There was a girl in junior high school that stalked and harassed me for about three years. She used to follow me home from school every day and yell “bitch.” It was pretty bad. In fact, when I got to the first corner turn, I’d run as fast as I could to get to the next block to escape the harassment. There's a whole bunch of other stuff, but I don't talk about it anymore. It's just over.

Like many girls my age, I was told to ignore it. THIS NEVER WORKS. Therefore, I was a really easy target – hey, why not bully Suzanne? She’s not going to do anything about it. I look back now and realize if I would have just gotten in this girl’s face and told her to go fuck herself, it would have stopped. I may have gotten punched (which was really unlikely, because looking back at this person, she was far more insecure than me), but I would have saved myself a lot of heartache. I was well into my 30s when I learned to stand up to bullies at work.

In 7th grade, specifically, I didn’t have a lot of friends. I’m sure the other girls didn’t want to risk the same thing happening to them. But I did have my books.

I used to love to read what I would call teen “pulp fiction.” Books about high school girls living there lives and overcoming their teen issues. They gave me companionship. And they gave me some hope.

I don’t mean this to be my sob story. There are people who have much sadder stories than getting bullied in junior high school. I just think it’s interesting what kind of memories old books can bring back.

Special note: I was also inspired to write this post by my friend Kathy, who wrote a great article on the topic of bullying. Hopefully, she'll post her insights on the topic here, too.

Any kid who tells on another kid is a dead kid

In my last post I mentioned the movie Over The Edge. I'm not sure why, but I think it's one of the funniest things I've ever seen. Can you even imagine what the Boomers who made this film were thinking about Gen X at the time?

Take a look at the trailer and tell me you know what to make it your next NetFlix selection.

John Hughes "got" Gen X

I've been meaning to write something about John Hughes. As a kid, he was my favorite director (and yes, I did have favorite directors as a kid - I had this thing about movies from the time I saw the movie Nine to Five.) His death is really the end of an era.

John Hughes wrote and directed movies about Gen X teenagers in which the kids were smart. The dialog was unique, because it really reflected the way Xers spoke at the time. We talked like adults - but we reasoned like teenagers. Before Hughes came along, most movies about my generation portrayed us as being possessed by the devil (either literally in movies like The Exorcist or figuratively in movies like Over the Edge - which is this awesomely hilarious movie with Matt Dillon where all the suburban teens are sent off to juvey.)

When I was in junior high school, my mom took me to see The Breakfast Club. People always are shocked that my mom had to take me, because everyone forgets that the movie was rated R. That film hit a nerve with me, because it was so spot on. I don't think you see teenagers portrayed that "real" anymore.

However, my favorite Hughes movie of all time was Sixteen Candles. I still quote from it (what's a-happening hot stuff?). I'd like to say that I identified with the Samantha character, but frankly, I was more like Farmer Ted.

Goodbye John Hughes. Thank you for being one of the first Boomers to "get" us. Thanks to you, there will be some proof to future generations that Gen Xers were not all "possessed" as teenagers.

More proof that Generation X should start in 1958

Typically, we say Generation X starts in 1965, because the Baby boom supposedly ended in 1964. However, I argue that since 1958 was the first year in an 11-year decline in birth rates in the U.S., then those born 1958-1964 are really more X than Boomer. (I could go on and on and on and on to the similarities, but it's still rather early here in Michigan).

Today I saw this video on http://www.punkrockhr.com/ and I thought, is Craig Ferguson an Xer? The answer: Well, kind of. He was born in 1962. So enjoy the video. And I'd love to hear your thoughts on when Xers started gracing this Earth - and why you picked that year.

The movies are at it again - are Gen Xers really possessed by the devil?

Okay, so when I do my presentations on Gen X, I usually like to include a part about how we've been dealing with an image problem since we were born. Basically, while the images of Boomers during their youth were wholesome, all-American kids like Gidget, Frankie, and Annette, Xers were portrayed as being possessed by the devil (Damien, Rosemary's Baby, Regan).

However, in 1984, a movie called Firestarter came out. It was the last of the child-as-demon genre. I argue it's because Gen Y was now around and therefore kids were "good" again.

Well, recently, I saw those trailers for that new movie called "The Orphan" and I thought, "OMG, they're going to do it to our kids - Gen Xers' kids also are going to be portrayed as demon-possessed."

But then I read the spoiler to this film. Here it is. I won't ruin it for you if you want to see the movie, but let's just say Generation X's demons apparently have not been exorcised yet.

Give us a break already, will you Hollywood?

The value of wisdom

There’s a lot being written these days by Millennials (born 1980-1999) about how they will revolutionize the workplace, mostly because they are 78 million strong and know how to work a Blackberry. However, with the risk of sounding like the glib Gen Xer that I am, I have to remind our young friends that a lot of their generation is still in elementary school and technology is always changing (therefore, your cohorts born in 1999 will kick your ass at technology when they enter the workforce in 2021).

I think what’s missing in these discussions is the value of wisdom. Learning from your mistakes. Learning because you’ve spent many many years dealing with assholes. Learning because you have to keep learning to succeed.

I could argue that Gen X is as tech-savvy as Gen Y, because we also grew up with fast-changing technology. Being tech-savvy is about being able to keep up with the technology. So then, it becomes a numbers game. The advantage is that Gen Y is a big generation. However, those middle school Millennials born in 1996 aren’t going to be entering the workplace for another 10 years.

In the meantime, the Boomers are still out there. They love to work. People keep saying they’ll retire, but I think they just like working too much. So for argument’s sake, let’s say they’re not as tech-savvy as the rest of us. Then how the heck did they get (and retain) so much control?
In the end, I think it comes down to relationship building and patience. And those things you learn from experience.

A couple years back I tried dying my hair red and it looked horrible. And I was in distress. And my 90-year-old Auntie Helen said, “Go to Sally Beauty Supply and buy this stuff and it will take the dye out. Sometimes you try things and they just don’t work.” I’m freaking out, but she told me to just go fix it.

We had to buy Auntie Helen a special remote control for her TV that is made for the developmentally disabled because she kept breaking the normal ones. So we can safely say that she is not tech savvy. But successful business people use Auntie Helen’s advice all the time. If it doesn’t work, fix it and move on.

What’s all this have to do with the Millennials? I would say most people, regardless of generation, have a harder time admitting their mistakes when they are in their 20s. I would also say that we’re a little more head strong at this age.

I think our successes in the workplace have less to do with numbers or technology than they do with wisdom.